Thursday 9 May 2013

Gelly Nails and STUPID NAMES

Currently I have lovely lilac nails, 'Prickly Pear' by Barry M.

Not my nails...


Since when has 'prickly pear' been lilac.

This brings me to the ridiculous names used by cosmetic companies today. I understand 'Red', 'Dark Red' 'Baby Pink' etc. I don't understand 'Prickly Pear', 'Fusion', 'Disco', 'Fury' etc

Imagine you're watching 'Mask' where Rocky is describing to blind Diana (Laura Dern) what colours feel like:


  • Roy L. 'Rocky' Dennis
    Thanks!
    I need to show you something.
  • Diana Adams
    What are you doing?
  • Roy L. 'Rocky' Dennis
    Wait!
    Just hold on a second.
  • Diana Adams
    No!
  • Roy L. 'Rocky' Dennis
    Right here. Sit down.
    Hold out your hands...
    Ready? Wait.
  • Diana Adams
    What is this?
  • Roy L. 'Rocky' Dennis
    Hold on a second! Damn!
    Wait a second. I got it right here.
    OK, ready?
  • Unknown
    No, what?
  • Roy L. 'Rocky' Dennis
    This is blue.
  • Unknown
    It's freezing!
  • Diana Adams
    It's blue?
  • Roy L. 'Rocky' Dennis
    This is green.
  • Diana Adams
    I think I understand.
  • Roy L. 'Rocky' Dennis
    Hold on!
    Shit! Sorry, Diana.
  • Diana Adams
    It's OK, I say that all the time.
  • Roy L. 'Rocky' Dennis
    You do?
    Put those down.
    This is red.
  • Diana Adams
    Ah! It's red?
  • Roy L. 'Rocky' Dennis
    When it cools down, it'll be pink.
  • Diana Adams
    Rocky, I understand!







Imagine trying to describe today's stupidly named products to Diana.  Rocky would have a hard time.

Now...Pears are green and therefore I assume prickly pears are also green but spiky. (talking about average pears here, not Asian pears which are white.)

Prickly Pears

OK I was wrong but dude! They are not lilac.

I propose we put an end to ridiculous names to nail varnishes and lipsticks but if anyone is offering, I'd love Tom Ford's 'Bitter Bitch' nail polish.  I'll leave you to decide what colour that might be.

10-4,




1 comment:

  1. Hahaha, absolutely brilliant! I lurve Relvon's nail varnishes' names and I sometimes plainly buy them cos of the names. Absolutely love this blogpost x

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